Black Orchid

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This space is actually a place for me to just dumped random thougts, feelings, poetry that I write. Nothing fancy. You can read if you want (or not. haha)

Black Orchid is just a pen name I’ve gotten for myself :)

“Alyaa, how do I start reading or like reading like you”

It’s a question I get very often. Tbh at that point when people ask, I have no idea what to answer because I haven’t actually really thought about it. But, a slump in my life made a barrier reef between me and reading – I had to re-fall in love again with what once I used to love. So,I think I can answer it now. Here goes :)

First off, the WHY you are reading is the core of this. Read because you want to know something. Is it to learn something new? Is it to know what other people’s life are like? Is it to relate to another person that is going through something similar to you? When you know that, your brain knows what it needs to get from this book and it will be more excited to dive in it :)

Second, authors have different writing styles, find the one that you like :) For me, I realized that I like authors that uses simple day to day english and author that write as though they are talking to me.

Third, find a book that has the layout and formatting that you like :) Do you like pictures? find magazines or pictures based books. You like book with the paragraph aligned in the centre? Find them.

Fourth, the material of the book is also very important. Do you prefer digital based books? Do you prefer cream coloured paper or white? For me, I like cream coloured paper and the cover to not the hard one. How about you?

Fifth, you don’t have to read everything single words in the book :) This I think is the main issue that most people have to be okay with. So, if its like a self help book – you don’t have to read everything, read the only topics that you want to know and its okay :) But if say its a novel, you can skip chapters if you want and go straight to the finale. Entirely up to you. So remove the notion that reading a book means looking at it from cover to cover.

Hope this helps! There is many different ways to learn, reading books need not be one. Find something that you actually enjoy learning from :)

Kemana pergi duhai mutia hati,

Setiap aksara namamu terpahat di sanubari,

Wahai Tuhan, pemerintah semesta antariksa,

Lindungi dia, rajuna yang ku damba.

One day,

When my love for you fades,

Life shall reset,

And as clear as day,

My heart will say,

Day one,

Warrior of the decade.

Everyone on earth is a walking with some sort of trauma in their lives. It’s either they realise or not.

Well, as Buddha puts it – life is sufferings. And in the Islamic perspective, you’re put on earth to be tested and be the caliphate for the end goal which is Heaven in the hereafter.

So, life will throw at you things and your choice of how you respond to it will either make or break you. Some become bitter, some become content and happy. It really depends on how people decide to resolve their problems.

If we break down a problem or pain – there is actually 2 parts to it. The physical/mechanical aspect to the problem. And the emotional disruption that the problem brings to you. Fixing the the physical aspect of the problem is the easy part. Fixing the emotional aspect of the problem is the harder one to deal with. But the latter, lingers for a while if it’s not addressed and will give a more permanent mark in someone. Personality wise or attitude wise.

But then, from young – we are not taught on how to deal with emotional problems. We are always taught to just “man up” and brush it off. Or just deal with it yourself. So asking for help to fix emotional pain is not something that’s natural for people. Actually, it’s shameful to do that. Especially in the Asian community, it’s even worse.

Now that I’m more aware of it, I’m slowly learning how to fix my own emotional issues. But man it ain’t easy. It’s a muscle that haven’t been used. So learning the skill is like rocket science. You’d be a mess and explode every now and then. But well, at least there is a start somewhere.

Like 20 mins ago, I drenched my mac with latte. My shirt was drenched, the floor was drenched, my laptop was soaking wet. I felt like crying.

But yknow, you just calm yourself and collect your composure. The beautiful lady next to me (that I was staring at for a while) instantly gave me tissue, nice lady. The owner of the store came with a mop and cleaned the place, he even offered me a new cup of coffee. To replace the one that spilled. Kind soul.

Idk what sign from god this is but I’m sure there is a reason things happen one after the other. I just want to go home hug my mom at this point.

Fixing it ain’t gonna be cheap, buying a new laptop ain’t cheap either. hmm.

Went to Hara cafe here in Bandung. Decided to chill here till around lunch time which after that I will go to NuArt Sculpture Park, of course to see the art. But then, when I came here I realised that this place is a hotel/eatery places. Which is awkward as I came in haha. but meh. Act nonchalant. haha.

The breeze here tho is amazing. I suck at taking photos but if only I can capture the moment here. Cold breeze surrounded by trees, greenhouses. These are the times where I’d wish I’ve invested in an iPhone…but then how do you capture the breeze and smell. Someone, invent something would ya.

After that, I went to NuArt Sculpture Park. The art there was a wee bit depressing. But well, art is an expression of ones inner self. So usually the ones that get potrayed to the outside world each day is the happy side of our lives. The dark parts are buried inside, so I think that’s why when we create art the dark parts is burning to come out. Unless, you are in totality a good person. Then, I admire it. I ain’t it.

My new favourite poem